So I need help in a couple departments....first and maybe the most important is CLOTHES!!!
You will be happy to know that the majority of the clothes in my closet are no longer from Lane Bryant - YES I have ventured out of those 4 walls! However, I am running into a little issue because nothing is speaking to me. Not like punk/goth clothes at all but I like a bit of an Edgy clothing look and can't seem to find any clothing lines that I really like. I found a couple at jcpenney like Bisou Bisou and Allen B. and then there is Material Girl at Macy's, but other than that I don't know where else to look!! If you know of any place you think I should check out please let me know!!!!
My second department in which I need help is more Lap-Band related!!
When I had my surgery I told my Husband, Mom, and Dad. No one else. I made that decision because I was afraid of a few things:
- People would try and talk to me out of it.
- It would be the center of every conversation.
- People would think I took the easy way out.
Now from that I know it sounds like I care about what others think, but I completely do not! I would have still had it, even if people tried to talk me out of it and if they thought it was the easy way out and I'm sure I could have dealt with talking about it all the time, but I didn't want to deal with those things. I'm not into DRAMA - AT ALL! I avoid it at all costs so that is kind of the biggest reason I kept it a "secret".
My question is.....do I keep it a secret forever? If I am going to tell people someday when is the right time?? Of course I wouldn't be like shouting it from the rooftops if I told anyone, but like if they asked how I lost weight I would mention it along with what I already mention "I'm exercising and cutting back my portions."
9 comments:
You look great, you sound great, who needs to know !!
What size are you wearing now? I can give you a few places - one of them is Torrid which is like a hot topic that carries sizes 12 and up so if you're a 12 or so, you can get stuff CHEAP. And they have cute things. Since I work in an office downtown, I have to dress up so I wear a lot of Style & Company from Macy's, which is hit or miss. I got a really cute houndstooth sweater from that brand and pants with zippers in the pockets. I tend to wear a lot of black and gray. :)
With regards to the band - I haven't told my in-laws, but a lot of friends know. It's hard. :(
I'm similar to you but my parents don't know. My husband and 3 friends know and that's it, its something that I struggle with.
I just don't want to be the centre of attention, I don't want to have to explain the band and I don't want people looking at what I'm eating and asking how much weight I've lost.
No answer there at all! But I know how you feel x
Clothing is hard--there is just too much to choose from. I just mainly go in anything I see and and have a look around-I do still look over at the big girl sections and have the urge to look.
Im a teller. In fact I just told one of my grad students yesterday. I look at it this way..if my experience can help someone else Im all over it. Sometimes that makes me a blabber mouth sometimes it might even be TMI but thats who I am.
xxxooo
Rue 21 is a great store for the style I think you are seeking. I think Old Navy, Torrid and Gap has some styles also I think you would like :)
As for telling everyone, like you - I told on my husband, parents, in-laws and a few select friends. I plan on keeping it a secret. I'm still having to do all the work and excercise, ya know? So when people ask what I've done, that's been my response. I feel like I'm being honest. Good luck with your decision. Sadly, I can't offer much advice because I am in the same sitation :)
I think it would be great if you told people. It will make you feel better knowing you don't have to worry about not saying anything!
I can't help on the clothing front, I haven't had any style since I got fat, so I'm definitely looking forward to rediscovering it when I get to a comfortable weight. I did see a catalog the other day that had really cute clothes at reasonable prices, and the web site is bodyc.com, not sure if it is my style yet, as i would need to try the stuff on and see how they look on me, but you can certainly take a look and see if it is anything your interested in.
As for telling people, someone else posted one, and I'm sorry that I don't remember who, that when people ask her what she is doing she tells them that she is limiting what she's eating, working out, and that she had lapband surgery, in that order, kind of down playing the surgery part. I, like you, didn't tell a whole bunch of my family or friends before hand because I did not want to hear any negative opinions, I was going to have it done and that was that. Since I have told family, or they have found out, rather, and have been shocked at the support I have received from them. I have not told many friends that aren't geologically close. When I see them and they see the weight loss I will not hide what I have done to attain it. I'm with Tina, if my experience can help someone I'm all for it! I don't feel like I've taken the easy way out any more than I would have by hiring a trainer, or taken weightloss pills or WW. It is a tool, not a cure all. Hope this helps you some.
I kept my surgery secret at first, but the news kind of slipped out. So now when people ask, I just come clean!
I think honesty is best. Take the stigma out of WLS. Just say it "I got the band. Works great for me." End of story. No apology, no hiding. Why hide it if you're not ashamed, right? And maybe someone who was thinking about it might be encouraged to ask you if you'd be willing to answer some questions so they can make up their mind. You might end up helping someone by coming clean.
I think lying about it just implies there is something wrong about getting it done. If you don't think it's wrong, then don't feel any need at all to hide it.
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